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YOU’RE TELLING US THERE’S A CHANCE?

Unless you’ve missed the video of Iliman Ndiaye pulling off a reverse bouncing nutmeg at Everton’s training ground, you should check it out. By pulling off a move so nasty that it would have been appropriate at a Harlem Globetrotters friendly display, the skill immediately shut down what was meant to be a lighthearted kickabout to finish what had been – up to that point – an illuminating interview about how non-professionals can earn a second chance after being dropped from professional academies.

Ndiaye, who played Sunday League football directly before being recruited by Sheffield United at 19, is perfectly positioned to speak on this topic. “Avoid dwelling on the rejection and one day your luck is going to materialize,” he informed a young player just before executing said ninja move on his teammate, in doing so perfectly illustrating the difference between Premier League and amateur footballers he had been working to minimize.

Ndiaye joins a list of professional footballer to take things that little bit too far. Prime Michael Owen gleefully humiliating a teenage keeper in front of a annoyed Neville Southall is obviously the gold standard in this particular niche – but the ex-Anfield star is just one of many culprits. Both Christian Eriksen and Shinji Kagawa have made young children cry with a series of merciless tricks, although it’s considered that the latter was at least inspired by the Japanese player’s social media apologetic post – “difficulty breeds resilience” – and the related tag of #friendship.

Kagawa’s previous Borussia partners Lukasz Piszczek, Jakub Blaszczykowski and Nuri Sahin at least had the manners to be defeated against 100 children when the three lined up during the interval of their final match for BVB. A Real Madrid XI that contained Cristiano Ronaldo and Xabi Alonso were not so generous when they played against 109 Chinese kids in a like situation. But back to the start, it’s approximated that only 180 of the 1.5 million boys currently playing competitive youth leagues in England will ever appear in the Premier League, a stark reality for aspiring footballers across the country.

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FEATURED STATEMENT

“The game guided me but it never deserted me because I never gave up on my goal. I went from place to place. The passion for soccer carries you. I couldn’t always see where it was directing me. But today I have the answer” – head coach Veljko Paunovic pauses briefly from his planning to reflect on his path.

READER CORRESPONDENCE

“Pleasant to learn that Kevin Mac Allister isn’t going to be left home alone by Argentina. Ideally, if he participates in the major tournament next year, he’ll research how to get about the host cities – let’s avoid him being disoriented in New York” – James Humphries.

“Information shows that 1,024 players in the Turkish league have been banned due to alleged involvement in a wagering issue. It would be amazing if that number could be bumped up to the same level of usual detail-orientation associated with Football Daily – that is, 1,057 readers. By my math, that’s about 33 more pedants. If I offer to be suspended from playing professionally in Turkey (hardly a difficult decision at my age and, um, talent), are there 32 more folks willing to join in my search for balance?” – Mike Wilner.

“As a regular follower and Florida resident, can I in advance protest about the coming period of published letters about which highway one uses to get to various locations in your homeland? I mean, I was stuck in gridlock on I-4 at 2am on a Tuesday night driving through Orlando once, but that’s the entire tale. There’s no meaningful conclusion to the tale. (I-4 joins Tampa on the Gulf Coast to Daytona on the Atlantic via Orlando/Walt Disney World, and can have delays at any time)” – Rasteen Nowroozi.

“Apropos Wythenshawe FC, I recall many years ago playing for a Sunday, very social side, Turnpike Lane Hibs, on Clapham Common. One morning a bloke presented as ‘Danny’ turned up to play. I have no idea who recruited him. Supposedly he was an actor; he had a decent left foot. (Yes, Daniel Day-Lewis)” – Jason Steger.

“Together with some co-workers and mates, I play a game of football each Friday afternoon. Our most experienced participant is nearing eight decades, while the most junior are in their young adulthood. To ensure a enjoyable experience for everyone, we have a simple rule of thumb regarding the ability standard: you can be quick or talented, but preferably not simultaneously. We occasionally have players who violate this rule, but usually typically reduce them to our quality over time” – Lars Esbjerg.